"When I was looking for a vintage 1990s floral dress I did not want a voluminous Elaine-from-“Seinfeld” dress, nor a prairie ankle-length trad-chic number, which eliminated many possibilities."
I forgot there that Freddie wasn't writing this, and I had the image of Freddie wearing just the *cutest* vintage 1990s dress.....
Thank you, O Bastet, for having made me....a cat. I wear pretty much the same thing every day, for everything, and it never goes out of style. Oh, and I look fucking great!
Searching, anticipating, putting in the obsessive effort, and then acquisition. The hunt is just as, if not more important, than the "consumption". I miss it more than the drugs themselves.
I'm a 40-year-old heterosexual male who loves football, scotch, and clothes shopping. I make no excuses for it and feel no need to defend it.* I will routinely go to the outlets and spend an immense amount of time browsing, often never buying anything. It's great and one of the most enjoyable hobbies possible.
*I broadly think people should just like what they like but that would destroy about 85% of all content on the internet so I I'm willing to sacrifice that position for the good of the economy.
I almost never buy clothes, my closet is still full of stuff from the 90's. But I do religiously shop for a few items every single year: blue jeans, sneakers, and socks.
I'll spend a ridiculous amount of time trying to find the right ones (even the socks), and will often pay more than a reasonable amount for them. The odd thing is I'll regularly wear the new jeans and shoes with the same dozen or so ratty, holey, old t-shirts I've had since the early aughts. And a pathetic sweatshirt if it's cold out.
This made me laugh out loud!! So very true (which is what makes it funny). Years ago, I scoured all of Orange County, CA (there visiting my sister) looking for women’s men style lace up wing tips. This was years ago. None to be found. A season or two later, they were everywhere (I of course wanted the Church 600 pair). I declared I (me!!) was the reason for this trend as every upscale retail shop discussed (obviously) the uptick in in inquires amongst themselves.
As you say, Phoebe, what was I going to wear them with? Hepburn trousers would have been perfect !!
My wife and I both grew up in middle working class families where fashion was never a thing. After we were married we moved into professional class jobs and had to at least match some expectation for dressing like working professionals. After we grew our income and had discretionary cash, we would both get to a random epiphany that our wardrobe selection had grown fashion stale. Then we go on a shopping spree to replace our closets... the old clothes donated to a shelter. And a sense that we did a great purge, clean and organize ending with a fresh new set of fashionable attire. Then this cycle repeats every few years.
It spoke to my own obsessions/compulsions. (My only properly published book is about vintage clothes.) I especially loved the bit about searching for the perfect version of the perfect item you saw on a TV or movie character! I mean, that's a niche obsession. To that end, I will share a website I've consulted in the past to identify a dress or coat or gown and then begin the rewarding search. It's https://wornontv.net.
I have a similar problem with book buying. I will attempt to track down particular editions that aren’t even valuable, they just match other editions I have or otherwise appeal to me. The problem is that often publishers will change the cover/design but not the ISBN, so if you search online you have no idea which edition it is. I always check out used bookstores in new cities with a mental checklist of things I’m looking for.
As a retired, 50+ man who has been with his wife for decades, I can honestly say that, clothes wise, I just wear what makes me feel comfortable: baggy corduroys. They look good with Cons or laceups, a button down shirt or a summer Tee. Back when I was an account manager, I spent a bit of time selecting good ties and textured shirts, but now I am out of that race, I feel no need to worry about that aspect of life. But, I have other obsessions: books, Arts & Crafts furniture, and machinist tools.
I am reminded of Scott Alexander’s piece on contrasting class markers as a result of social status anxiety - everybody focuses on not being mistaken for the class below them.
So a slob nobody in dirty jeans and a stained white tee very clearly doesn’t care about fashion- to avoid being mistaken for such a one, one garishly focuses on displaying good taste in fashion.
One social class up, one can display one’s disdain for neurotically looking fashionable by emphasizing that, as you say, “you’re not supposed to care” what you look like. Such a one is secure enough in their position in the social hierarchy that there is no danger in being mistaken for the slob nobody.
One level up, one might deliberately choose tasteful clothes with designer labels to emphasize you aren’t some chic journalist ostentatiously avoiding pretty clothing- you’re so prosperous that you can afford the priciest brands and most exclusive styles that normal people could never opt for due to the price tag. You buy them, so that nobody mistakes you as the other guy.
One level up, you own significant portions of the planet and there is NO chance somebody might mistake you for some rando, so you can go with normal clothing that attracts no attention whatsoever- this distinguishes you from the new money multimillionaire showing off the labels. And so on.
This piece reminded me again to be thankful for the truckers' protest over pandemic restrictions. If they hadn't been so successful then Canadians would probably still be stuck in lockdown hell.
As a man with similar proclivities, I pass no judgment.
Great essay, took me a minute to realize it wasn’t by Freddie - I was like oh I didn’t know Freddie is looking for the perfect fitting floral dress…
"When I was looking for a vintage 1990s floral dress I did not want a voluminous Elaine-from-“Seinfeld” dress, nor a prairie ankle-length trad-chic number, which eliminated many possibilities."
I forgot there that Freddie wasn't writing this, and I had the image of Freddie wearing just the *cutest* vintage 1990s dress.....
Thank you, O Bastet, for having made me....a cat. I wear pretty much the same thing every day, for everything, and it never goes out of style. Oh, and I look fucking great!
It’s the hunter-gatherer in us. If I could figure out a less costly substitute I’d bottle it.
Searching, anticipating, putting in the obsessive effort, and then acquisition. The hunt is just as, if not more important, than the "consumption". I miss it more than the drugs themselves.
I'm a 40-year-old heterosexual male who loves football, scotch, and clothes shopping. I make no excuses for it and feel no need to defend it.* I will routinely go to the outlets and spend an immense amount of time browsing, often never buying anything. It's great and one of the most enjoyable hobbies possible.
*I broadly think people should just like what they like but that would destroy about 85% of all content on the internet so I I'm willing to sacrifice that position for the good of the economy.
I almost never buy clothes, my closet is still full of stuff from the 90's. But I do religiously shop for a few items every single year: blue jeans, sneakers, and socks.
I'll spend a ridiculous amount of time trying to find the right ones (even the socks), and will often pay more than a reasonable amount for them. The odd thing is I'll regularly wear the new jeans and shoes with the same dozen or so ratty, holey, old t-shirts I've had since the early aughts. And a pathetic sweatshirt if it's cold out.
It doesn't make any sense.
This made me laugh out loud!! So very true (which is what makes it funny). Years ago, I scoured all of Orange County, CA (there visiting my sister) looking for women’s men style lace up wing tips. This was years ago. None to be found. A season or two later, they were everywhere (I of course wanted the Church 600 pair). I declared I (me!!) was the reason for this trend as every upscale retail shop discussed (obviously) the uptick in in inquires amongst themselves.
As you say, Phoebe, what was I going to wear them with? Hepburn trousers would have been perfect !!
My wife and I both grew up in middle working class families where fashion was never a thing. After we were married we moved into professional class jobs and had to at least match some expectation for dressing like working professionals. After we grew our income and had discretionary cash, we would both get to a random epiphany that our wardrobe selection had grown fashion stale. Then we go on a shopping spree to replace our closets... the old clothes donated to a shelter. And a sense that we did a great purge, clean and organize ending with a fresh new set of fashionable attire. Then this cycle repeats every few years.
Superb essay.
It spoke to my own obsessions/compulsions. (My only properly published book is about vintage clothes.) I especially loved the bit about searching for the perfect version of the perfect item you saw on a TV or movie character! I mean, that's a niche obsession. To that end, I will share a website I've consulted in the past to identify a dress or coat or gown and then begin the rewarding search. It's https://wornontv.net.
I have a similar problem with book buying. I will attempt to track down particular editions that aren’t even valuable, they just match other editions I have or otherwise appeal to me. The problem is that often publishers will change the cover/design but not the ISBN, so if you search online you have no idea which edition it is. I always check out used bookstores in new cities with a mental checklist of things I’m looking for.
As a retired, 50+ man who has been with his wife for decades, I can honestly say that, clothes wise, I just wear what makes me feel comfortable: baggy corduroys. They look good with Cons or laceups, a button down shirt or a summer Tee. Back when I was an account manager, I spent a bit of time selecting good ties and textured shirts, but now I am out of that race, I feel no need to worry about that aspect of life. But, I have other obsessions: books, Arts & Crafts furniture, and machinist tools.
I am reminded of Scott Alexander’s piece on contrasting class markers as a result of social status anxiety - everybody focuses on not being mistaken for the class below them.
So a slob nobody in dirty jeans and a stained white tee very clearly doesn’t care about fashion- to avoid being mistaken for such a one, one garishly focuses on displaying good taste in fashion.
One social class up, one can display one’s disdain for neurotically looking fashionable by emphasizing that, as you say, “you’re not supposed to care” what you look like. Such a one is secure enough in their position in the social hierarchy that there is no danger in being mistaken for the slob nobody.
One level up, one might deliberately choose tasteful clothes with designer labels to emphasize you aren’t some chic journalist ostentatiously avoiding pretty clothing- you’re so prosperous that you can afford the priciest brands and most exclusive styles that normal people could never opt for due to the price tag. You buy them, so that nobody mistakes you as the other guy.
One level up, you own significant portions of the planet and there is NO chance somebody might mistake you for some rando, so you can go with normal clothing that attracts no attention whatsoever- this distinguishes you from the new money multimillionaire showing off the labels. And so on.
Fortunate to be a man, in California, and in a class where cargo shorts and an aloha shirt are always in style.
This piece reminded me again to be thankful for the truckers' protest over pandemic restrictions. If they hadn't been so successful then Canadians would probably still be stuck in lockdown hell.